I find my giant basket of medication depressing.
That is all.
Love
Mango Kitty
Tuesday, July 31, 2012
Monday, July 30, 2012
Alert bracelet
So my medical alert bracelet has arrived, but it felt very very wierd putting it on. I guess I should be using DBT's Radical Acceptance skill. This is a disease that I have, and if something realy goes to hell, the people who help need to know that it could related to epilepsy. But radical acceptance is hard, and I'm not.quite there yet. But I'm trying.
Anyways, i'm falling again so maybe it's good that it showed up when it did.
Love,
Mango Kitty
Saturday, July 28, 2012
Rediculous
It's about 25*C (75*F) outside, and it's freaking 32* (OVER90*) in our apartment! That does NOT help me. Poor Indi is tired and lethargic, probably from the heat and the medication. And Mi-Go was too warm to wake me up at 2am. And Nils, the clever man he is, is at Smallcon (a gaming convention his gaming club D.O.M.M. holds every year). Which leaves me to clean and do laundry in a 90* apartment. FRAK!
Every time I hear a noise I run to find Indi, I'm so scared she's going to have another asthma attack. I did dust today and am going to do the floors after I chat with my sister and her little ones. Hopefully that will help prevent another one from happening, though when I asked the Vet if dust makes it worse she said that they really don't know, but I'm doing it anyways, because I don't know what else I can do for her right now. Besides giving her her medication, which she does NOT like. We're going to try coating them in butter, I've read that it makes it easier to swallow and tasts better. Hopefully it will help because it takes 4-5 times before I get her to swallow the damn thing. I can't blame her though, she doesn't understand why I'm forcing a pill into her mouth, she can't know that I'm doing it to help her.
Oh well, hopefully my next post will be about how wonderfully comfortable it is in our apartment and I don't have to cold shower every day to keep me from over heating. Also, hopefully the future will not include me dunking my cats into cool water to help them cool off. They weren't so happy about it but were much more their normal selves afterwards. Hurray for evaporation!
Love,
Mango Kitty
Every time I hear a noise I run to find Indi, I'm so scared she's going to have another asthma attack. I did dust today and am going to do the floors after I chat with my sister and her little ones. Hopefully that will help prevent another one from happening, though when I asked the Vet if dust makes it worse she said that they really don't know, but I'm doing it anyways, because I don't know what else I can do for her right now. Besides giving her her medication, which she does NOT like. We're going to try coating them in butter, I've read that it makes it easier to swallow and tasts better. Hopefully it will help because it takes 4-5 times before I get her to swallow the damn thing. I can't blame her though, she doesn't understand why I'm forcing a pill into her mouth, she can't know that I'm doing it to help her.
Oh well, hopefully my next post will be about how wonderfully comfortable it is in our apartment and I don't have to cold shower every day to keep me from over heating. Also, hopefully the future will not include me dunking my cats into cool water to help them cool off. They weren't so happy about it but were much more their normal selves afterwards. Hurray for evaporation!
Love,
Mango Kitty
Friday, July 27, 2012
Good kitty
Poor Indi had to go to the vet yesterday... Might be asthma, might be some kind of virus. She needs to take medication two times a day for 10 days, then the vet.will call and we'll see if they have to take x-rays to figure what is going on. :(
But sense going.to the vet is.so traumatic for her we picked up some things. We got a fancy new carrier with a waterbowl attatched to the door for a really good price, we'll probably get a nother one eventually so both cats can have more space/security/water when we have to take them someplace. And ofcorse our Indi needed a new pink mouse as a reward for being somewhat copperative.
I'm so worried abou our baby, we're just trying to be as calm and comferting to her as possible so we don't totaly stress her out. (as you can probably guess, I am not so good at it) please send lots of love to our cats!
Love,
Mango Kitty
Wednesday, July 25, 2012
Happy Birthday to me
Check out my birthday video!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vScACLq7RnQ
What a wonderful way to start my birthday, I've watched this like 6 times today already! I love these little ones SO MUCH and it means the world to me that they know who I am and would be willing to sing to me even though I live across the ocean :) Hurray for technology!
As for birthday plans, we have none, other then my inlaws will be coming up for fika later and help me run some errands. Also, give the cat's their "manicure".
This is especially important for my poor Flufferella Indi. She's had two episodes where it looks and sounds like she is having an asthma attack. It's so scary! According to the vet there is such a thing as cat asthma, and it's rather serious. My beautiful friend is helping us with a ride to the vet in the morning, where we will do whatever we can for our baby girl. We don't have children, and we're not GOING to have children, our animals are our children and we are going to do the best we can for her. But it's scary, and there's been lots of worrying and crying, but I have to believe in the end she will be fine.
Happy Birthday to Me,
Love,
Mango Kitty
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vScACLq7RnQ
What a wonderful way to start my birthday, I've watched this like 6 times today already! I love these little ones SO MUCH and it means the world to me that they know who I am and would be willing to sing to me even though I live across the ocean :) Hurray for technology!
As for birthday plans, we have none, other then my inlaws will be coming up for fika later and help me run some errands. Also, give the cat's their "manicure".
This is especially important for my poor Flufferella Indi. She's had two episodes where it looks and sounds like she is having an asthma attack. It's so scary! According to the vet there is such a thing as cat asthma, and it's rather serious. My beautiful friend is helping us with a ride to the vet in the morning, where we will do whatever we can for our baby girl. We don't have children, and we're not GOING to have children, our animals are our children and we are going to do the best we can for her. But it's scary, and there's been lots of worrying and crying, but I have to believe in the end she will be fine.
Happy Birthday to Me,
Love,
Mango Kitty
Thursday, July 19, 2012
bitch bitch moan moan
Bitch bitch moan moan emotional pain physical pain medication medication medication sugar exhausted restless inspired devastated beautiful obese inked scarred hungry full coffee tea creative lethargic worried in slow motion living in the past terrified of the future if is there a future dress the dolly burn it down scream scream scream leave no evidence.
incapable of a single coherent thought.
Love,
Mango Kitty
incapable of a single coherent thought.
Love,
Mango Kitty
Tuesday, July 17, 2012
mind v.s. body
I know it's short notice and everything, but can I have a new body for my birthday? Pretty pretty please? One that can read patterns and sew on her own would be a nice touch as well.
I've got all these projects going in my head...crafts to make, paintings to paint, dresses to sew, plants to add to my collection, songs to learn on the piano.
There's just one problem... My body CAN NOT keep up with the creative part of my mind. It just doesn't work. Im too tired to do any of the things I want to do. and am in too much pain to clean up so that I can have the SPACE to do what I want to do.
Tomorrow a friend is coming over to help me sew a dress. I'm very excited, because I really really like her but never get to see her because she lives so far away. But she¨s coming tomorrow and we shall have a sewing party as long as my hands cooperate.
In other news, my Viking bought me some pretty flowers because I've been feeling so crappy, and Mi-Go thinks the plastic they're in is as tasty as can be. Have you ever seen a cat, standing next to a plant, licking the plastic around it? I bet you you havent. And if you have I want pictures because I don't believe you.
Love,
Mango Kitty
I've got all these projects going in my head...crafts to make, paintings to paint, dresses to sew, plants to add to my collection, songs to learn on the piano.
There's just one problem... My body CAN NOT keep up with the creative part of my mind. It just doesn't work. Im too tired to do any of the things I want to do. and am in too much pain to clean up so that I can have the SPACE to do what I want to do.
Tomorrow a friend is coming over to help me sew a dress. I'm very excited, because I really really like her but never get to see her because she lives so far away. But she¨s coming tomorrow and we shall have a sewing party as long as my hands cooperate.
In other news, my Viking bought me some pretty flowers because I've been feeling so crappy, and Mi-Go thinks the plastic they're in is as tasty as can be. Have you ever seen a cat, standing next to a plant, licking the plastic around it? I bet you you havent. And if you have I want pictures because I don't believe you.
Love,
Mango Kitty
Monday, July 16, 2012
confusion
Stupid freaking medical professionals!
I was supposed to have a telephone time with my Dr. this morning between 8-9 regarding a new medication that had a warning label on it for people who have Epilepsy. After waiting until 10.00 I called the hospital and they first said that he had forgotten. Then they called back and said I didn't have a telephone time with him until the 19th. Then I talked to a different nurse who said that a Different Dr. had tried to call me but I didn't answer (which was bullshit because I've been up and functioning sense 06.00 with both phones on me at all times). Then the second nurse called me back and said that they checked with a DIFFERENT Dr. and it's fine for me to take this medication even if I have Epilepsy. WTF???
Today has not the makings for a good day my friends.
Love,
Mango Kitty
I was supposed to have a telephone time with my Dr. this morning between 8-9 regarding a new medication that had a warning label on it for people who have Epilepsy. After waiting until 10.00 I called the hospital and they first said that he had forgotten. Then they called back and said I didn't have a telephone time with him until the 19th. Then I talked to a different nurse who said that a Different Dr. had tried to call me but I didn't answer (which was bullshit because I've been up and functioning sense 06.00 with both phones on me at all times). Then the second nurse called me back and said that they checked with a DIFFERENT Dr. and it's fine for me to take this medication even if I have Epilepsy. WTF???
Today has not the makings for a good day my friends.
Love,
Mango Kitty
Friday, July 13, 2012
Swollen
I finally went to the Doctor for it today and she said it was probably something to do with the salt levels in my blood or something to do with my thyroid. So they took some blood tests and now it's a waiting game. I'm really hoping that it's something as simple as stopping eating salt, though I usually skip that as an ingredient, but who knows.
The other news, is I got a new psychiatric medication today that works both as an anti-depressent and a sleeping pill. My psychiatric Dr went on and on about how much it would help. When I went to read the labals to see if I had to lay down right away after taking it or if I should take it a while before I go to bed, I found in nice bold letters,
"Do Not Take This Medication If You Have Epilepsy"
ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME????
WHY IS MY DR, WHO KNOWS I HAVE EPILEPSY, PRESCRIBING ME MEDICATION THAT IS NOT SUPPOSED TO BE TAKEN BY SOMEONE WITH EPILEPSY?!?!?
Thank God I read the label, Don't want to even think of the mess that could have created.
Oh, by the way, another side effect was "Suicide". Lovely.
Love,
Mango Kitty
Thursday, July 12, 2012
Loosing It
Feels like I'm loosing things left and right...
I.D.'s
Friends
My Sanity...
I don't know what to say... I just...
I'm lonely, and desperate for help.
I can still see that I have an amazing husband and two great monsters, but yesterday I expected to get a lot of psychiatric help, and ended up just being sent home. Today I've been light headed and shaky all day, (yes I've eaten, yes I've been drinking water) my legs feel like they way 100kg each and I can't SEE anything. I'm definitely putting any birthday money I get on new glasses. Now that I'm not falling anymore I can actually take the risk on investing in eyesight. (broke my last pair of glasses in a fall)
I miss my family desperately, my Moms, my Dad and his wife, my Sisters and all the little ones.
Therapist still on vacation,
Treatment home still closed,
Still don't know what to do.
Love,
Mango Kitty
I.D.'s
Friends
My Sanity...
I don't know what to say... I just...
I'm lonely, and desperate for help.
I can still see that I have an amazing husband and two great monsters, but yesterday I expected to get a lot of psychiatric help, and ended up just being sent home. Today I've been light headed and shaky all day, (yes I've eaten, yes I've been drinking water) my legs feel like they way 100kg each and I can't SEE anything. I'm definitely putting any birthday money I get on new glasses. Now that I'm not falling anymore I can actually take the risk on investing in eyesight. (broke my last pair of glasses in a fall)
I miss my family desperately, my Moms, my Dad and his wife, my Sisters and all the little ones.
Therapist still on vacation,
Treatment home still closed,
Still don't know what to do.
Love,
Mango Kitty
Thursday, July 5, 2012
Medical Mystery No More
As of last Friday I was diagnosed with Epilepsy. That's why I've been falling like I have. I have Epileptic activity on both the left and right side of my brain, though more in the left side than the right side. The neurologist did not say what lobes are being affected and I didn't think to ask. It IS treatable with medication, I've been on the meds for almost a week now and there's already a huge improvement. Next Wednesday I'm getting an MRI on my brain. Apparently some kinds of brain tumors can present themselves as Epilepsy, though my Neurologist does not believe this is the case she wants to be certain and rule out the possibility of a tumor, which I appreciate.
In one way, this is a good thing. It explains why I've been falling (psychosomatic my ASS) and it is treatable with 4 pills a day. No injections, no surgery, no having my legs amputated in a shady hospital in Russia (yes I still do have that nightmare!) Soon I will move back to the crutch from the walker, and eventually will function like a somewhat normal person.
On the other hand, HOLY FUCK I HAVE EPILEPSY. It's a scary diagnosis even though it's very treatable. Because it means that there is actually something wrong with my brain. And brains are kind of important (or so I've heard). It also means that I cannot drive, ride a bicycle, watch certain TV shows/movies, ride roller coasters, or have children. The last part isn't as big as many would assume considering that we are not planning to have children anyways but it's still... it's... well I don't really know what it is. It just sucks.
I keep going from being relieved to absolutely devastated, but I assume that's part of the process of accepting this new part of my life.
Love,
Mango Kitty
In one way, this is a good thing. It explains why I've been falling (psychosomatic my ASS) and it is treatable with 4 pills a day. No injections, no surgery, no having my legs amputated in a shady hospital in Russia (yes I still do have that nightmare!) Soon I will move back to the crutch from the walker, and eventually will function like a somewhat normal person.
On the other hand, HOLY FUCK I HAVE EPILEPSY. It's a scary diagnosis even though it's very treatable. Because it means that there is actually something wrong with my brain. And brains are kind of important (or so I've heard). It also means that I cannot drive, ride a bicycle, watch certain TV shows/movies, ride roller coasters, or have children. The last part isn't as big as many would assume considering that we are not planning to have children anyways but it's still... it's... well I don't really know what it is. It just sucks.
I keep going from being relieved to absolutely devastated, but I assume that's part of the process of accepting this new part of my life.
Love,
Mango Kitty
Monday, July 2, 2012
Red Head
A note to family, If you have not heard the Neurologists diagnoses please contact me so I can let you know before I announce it publicly. Doesn't seem like the kind of thing for family to hear for the first time on facebook...
Love,
Mango Kitty
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