sausage

It's 02:40 and it smells like sausage. I am unimpressed with both things in that sentence.

There probably wont be much posting for a few days, Thursday is moving day (YAY!) then friday I'm off to Halmstad to help set up for Lovely Linda's wedding, then the actual wedding Saturday (YAY!), then cleaning the old apartment Sunday, then off to meet with my guidance councilor about studying from home on Monday. Tuesday I rest. Oh wait, no I don't, I unpack!

All very good things... (except for sausage at 2:40am)

Love,
Mango Kitty

Move-zilla!

RAWR! I AM MOVE-ZILLA! I must organize EVERY DETAIL of our move and decide the EXACT TIME that the oven will be cleaned a WEEK before it needs to be!!! WAAAHAHAHA!! Fear my over-planning and tremble at the sight of my weekly spreadsheet!

ok... maybe I need to calm down a bit....








Love,
Mango Kitty

the lonely Jew

I wish I could go to Temple. I'm feeling very much like the lonely Jew of Salamanderland. I'm not an overly religious person, but I do enjoy reading my prayer book on Shabbat. And though my Hebrew is not up to par, I do try to whisper the Kaddish with my glass of wine. Doing this helps ground me, and helps me keep my life in perspective. But it also reminds me how I am the only Jew in a very large area. I've searched for others, I have not found them. There are only three Synagogues in Sweden. Non of which are within reasonable travel distance for Friday services. I hope someday to attend services in Malmö, but there is nothing planned of yet. For now it's just me and my living room, and a prayer book given to me by my father. In this book I found the prayer of the evening, which is helping me have a better perspective on my fibromyalgia:

O God, help me to remember the good I can do, even when I am weak and in pain. And help me, on this and every Shabbat, to see beyond my troubles, that I may be a blessing to others - and to myself.

I find it interesting how many people think it cliché to believe in god. How it's uncool to go to church every week, or read a prayerbook before you go to sleep. Personally I don't really care what religion you have, or who you do or do not believe in. As long as you are an honorable, good, loving person, you're ok in my book.

Love,
Mango Kitty

blöta kisse katterna ^^

We move in a week. IN A WEEK!!! I'm so excited but I'm also a wee bit overwhelmed by all of this. Today we got rid of our old couch and the empty space is making this move feel very very real. There's a good amount of packing still to be done, and then we have to spit shine the apartment before we turn the keys over. This in addition to going to school and doing homework and oh have I mentioned I'm going to be a bridesmaid two days after the move? GAH! It's all very good stuff, I just wish I had a little time in between all of it so I could actually breath...

I met with the principle at school today. Unfortunately there's not really anything they can do if I can't identify the jerks who have been harassing me. So next time it happens I have to actually look at their faces enough to remember it in a photo line up. Then once they know who to talk to, they promise they'll make their point known. We'll see what happens.

Bath day at the zoo went fine. I'm happy to say wet cat smells much better than wet dog. Looks funnier too ^^

Love,
Mango Kitty

the good, the bad, the horselike.

before I say anything else I want to say CONGRATULATIONS to my dear sister and her husband on the birth of their beautiful daughter!!!! So. SO exciting :)

In other news I, apparently, resemble an ugly horse. This bullying has to stop, the school has to do something about it. (No really, they do. It's the law) I have a meeting with the principle tomorrow morning, and it will be interesting to see what he has to say. Hopefully they will come up with a plan of action, because I cant keep going to school just to be called names and made to hate myself.

maybe I should bring Mi-Go into school tomorrow and let him eat their souls...?
One can only hope they're allergic to cats...

Love,
Mango Kitty

Möhippa!!!

Boy oh Boy did we have a weekend! As the one and only bridesmaid of Lovely Linda, it was my task to throw a bachelorette party, and I have to say I did a DAMN good job! We started off the day kidnapping Linda at her home at 10.00 and dressing her to the nines, with a pink whig and a pink tutu, and all the girls attending got a pink streak in their hair. (yes, even I wore pink in my hair!) After a champaign breakfast it was off to Hamsterland for the biggest salads ever served for lunch. Anywhere. Ever!

After lunch we gave our bride a few tasks to achieve. Some examples would be "Get a guy to let you wear his hat", and "Get a guy to show you his belly button" It was hilarious, and she cranked threw them like a true champion! After words it was off to a privet dance class to learn part of a choreographed hip-hop routine. Everyone did great! Then we went to where the wedding will be located, it's beautiful! Kind of like where our Swedish wedding was, but much bigger. It's going to be fabulous.

After dinner we went out to show off our dancing skills, though I hate to say we were out shined by The Hamster Man. I so wish we had gotten a picture or video of him, but he danced like a hamster. Seriously. I'm not kidding.

All in all it was a fabulous day, I'm so happy everything worked out and that Lovely Linda had a great time, even with her cold :)

Love,
Mango Kitty

Dear Mr. Buss Driver,

Dear Mr. Buss Driver,
If you turn down the wrong street, and back up in order to turn around, please make sure you do not back into oncoming traffic.

Moving on...

I need more energy than I have. Perhaps I've picked the wrong time to give up coffee... School is better, but it's still long hours (for me) and lots and lots of homework. Plus I'm going in to school longer hours Wednesdays so I can get extra help, and then there's an apartment to pack while still living in said apartment and trying to maneuver around boxes piled up to our armpits while dodging cats and, you guessed it, more boxes. Then there's the fact that I still have to go to school on the Thursday we're moving, then after school on Friday I'm going to Halmstad to be a bridesmaid in lovely Linda's wedding on Saturday then we're leaving the festivities early so that we can get back to Salamanderland to do a crazy super clean on the apartment Sunday before we have to turn over the keys on Monday morning on my way to school. Whew! All very good stuff! Do you think I can replace coffee with energy drinks? That's still better... right??? Maybe not...

I'm very excited for all of these things to happen, I'm just hoping I will be able to focus on one think at a time as it comes. One thing is for sure though, I'm taking my bridesmaids duties very seriously, and am preparing a foolproof emergency kit for all of Linda's bridal disasters, of which there will be none! Purely preventative measures! and have been training wearing high heels so that I won't fall in the impossibly high heels I'm meant to wear with my dress. I'll post a picture of them eventually, they're GORGEOUS!

Alright, off to read Arkan Asaad's "Stjärnlösa Nätter" (can you believe it? I'm READING! IN SWEDISH!!!)

Love,
Mango Kitty

goodbye space monkey

Today I finished my journal. :(

It may sound silly to be upset over this, but I grow very attached to my journals. They become a piece of me, I share things with them that I don't even share with my Viking, and I take them EVERYWHERE. This one has been with me threw good and bad, hospitals and vacations, work training and school. Thank you for letting me share my journey with you, you space monkey of a journal you <3


In other news, I'm homesick. I had a nice chat with Ima today, but I miss her hugs. I'm missing Noah growing up and I still haven't even met his little sister. I miss my sisters and wish i could be there to help when Baby Girl Provan enters the world. I want to babysit, I want to raid dads fridge, I want to go to the woods with Ima and Sue, I want to be involved with my family in a way that is impossible, because I live in Sweden. Not really walking distance to New York. I love Sweden, and I have no intention of moving back to the states, I just wish there wasn't an ocean in between me and my family.

Oh well, off to find a new journal I suppose...

Love,
Mango Kitty

attack of the killer tomatoes!!!

Man it's still Thursday... all day I've been thinking it's Friday. Hoping, Longing, Wishing it was Friday, but alas, here I am, clutched in the cold arms of weekday hell. Sigh.

School is crazy hard, but starting next week I'll be getting some extra help on Wednesdays, thank goodness. The days are long and there's HOURS of homework and it's soooo much more than I'm used to doing and whine whine whine.

Also, it is FALL. Really really fall with leaves on the ground and cold rain and it's dark before 20.00. BLAH! I hate the fall. It's so cold at nights now that I had to pick my tomatoes before they get all frozen. Hopefully they'll ripen up in the windowsill. It's also time to start breaking down my balcony garden, and find good homes for my plants. Unfortunately 80% of the plants I have out there are toxic to cats so I cant bring them inside. (Our monsters chew on EVERYTHING) Also, I think it's time to give up on my sunflower... my very tall, non blooming sunflower. What a failure. Hopefully it's not a sign of things to come!

Love,
Mango Kitty

Brains? What brains?

I have been studying ALL DAY from home and my brains have turned to mush. Icky, Sticky, Mush.
On Sunday Linda and I had a dress/veil making party at our place, the bridesmaid dress I ordered for her wedding is a full 8cm too long, so some serious hemm-age was needed. The cats, as always, were incredibly unhelpful.

Yesterday I had a meeting with my guidance councilor. She was really upset by what's been happening to me at school and assured me the school is taking this very seriously. All of the higher ups know about it, and I'm meeting with the Principal tomorrow about it. I'm supposed to walk to classes with someone always (the theory being they wont say anything if I'm with someone) and my guidance councilor is going to escort me to the buss at the end of the day. It feels ridiculous that these measures have to be taken, but it's a relief that they're taking me seriously. She said I was brave to come to her.
I also had a home visit from my therapist yesterday, who has given me the best advice so far on the subject. "Don't let them win".

My therapist was so happy to see Mi-Go, we actually got him threw her, she had another client with kittens and we said we wanted one so she picked out our little monster and brought him to us! She was very impressed with how big he has gotten, and how shiny he is. (he IS remarkably shiny) She also was won over by Indi's charms, flufferella spent most of the session trying to get into her purse and flopping all over everyone.

I'm so exhausted by all of this stuff. I'm ready for September to be over. Let move on to Halloween k?

Love,
Mango Kitty

promenad

I'm sorry, I had what I was going to write all planned in my head and then the cats came stampeding in and ran strait into the wall and I died of laughing. Thank goodness I have them, they're too ridiculous not to love <3

Instead of my planned witty remarks, I give you this:

Nils has been off kidnapping our friend for his bachelor party (which might I add started at 8am!) So I've been home by myself all day. I took a break from studying and went for a walk. These are some of the things I saw along my way.

"tjockis"

It Happened Again. I did really well in school today, I participated in class, even joined a study group during our lunch break. But it was ruined by another nasty comment. "Hej Tjockis! Hör du det?" Hey Fatty! Did you hear that? (that being me calling you fatty)

I really don't know what to do about this. I don't have the guts to confront them, honestly if I did I'd probably end up crying in front of them while mumbling incoherent Swedish which would make the comments worse I'm sure. I WANT to study and I WANT to succeed in school, but to be honest I never want to step foot in that building again. If this is what the first week of school is like, how the HELL am I going to do a year?

I'm frustrated by how much these comments effect me. I know that they come from these teenagers insecurities about themselves and so forth, but no matter how much I rationalize it, it HURTS. It just hurts... I have enough trouble with issues of weight and diet without them antagonizing it. I don't want to shut down and drop out of school, but the risk potential is growing, and that both frightens, and deeply saddens me. I don't want to care what they say, I don't want too let it get under my skin, but I cant help it. It makes me cry every time. I've emailed my guidance counceler about it, though I doubt anything can be done...

also, I'm giving up coffee.

Love,
Mango Kitty

stair-master

I'm happy to report that besides a small incident which involved me falling down the stairs, today has been a better day. I felt like I was going to be sick from nervs all morning getting ready but I made it on the buss and attended class like a champ. Then found out I'm very very bad at Swedish grammar (but I mean really, who is GOOD at Swedish grammar? I dare you to find someone) not really a surprise. Then while everyone was gossiping for an hour while the teacher was giving people their individual reviews, I did work. Which means I have no homework for that class tomorrow, or over the weekend. HA! Apparently not having any friends does have some benefit.

Tomorrow is another long day. On an entirely different note, does anyone have any suggestions for some nice non-toxic-to-cats plants?

Love,
Mango Kitty